disintegration

hold me

for there i go

the disintegration

of my person
has begun
the ingredients
of my elements
are falling apart
in the disorder
of things
you have
lit the death fire
razing me
to the ground
to the level
of all others
the system which
i so proudly held
you have succeeded
in making it unrecognizable
hold me for
there i go
i cannot bear
to see it so
the being
that was one whole
is gone
that thing called me
is no more

 

walk away free

kill your soul

and live on
the currency
for buying peace
no questions
no hopes
no aberrations
live on
fulfill obligations
do your duty
duty
the primordial millstone
the millstone
we all carry
often willingly
sometimes grudgingly
for we have
promised to tag along
to break not the shell
to feel not the air
do all that we hate
and carry on
pull the shutters down
let the brain freeze
let the heart die
to hurt all the time
but not dare
to live and
walk away free

morning dew

 

the torture of my eyes

is the pain

of my soul
the dark circles
their guardian
they look on
my eyes
silently
awaiting the outcome
when
will the sun rise
when
will dawn break
the soul is restless
for the  brightness
of day
time is a dark cage
but
i will live through
i will survive
it all
it cannot go on
being night
all pain must ease
one day
when light will make
its graceful advent
the cool breeze shall
raise spirits sky high
and my soul will
bathe in morning dew

gnawing hunger

it rises to a crescendo
and then
gradually dies down
after all, how long
will hunger gnaw
how long your
stomach growl
it has its limits
if it does not get
what it wants
it will quiet down
soon your exhaustion
will overpower you
and your tears
put you to sleep
as you huddle
your knees to your
caving belly
your raving mind
will travel
in your dreams
it will go back
to caring hands
it will dwell
in imagination
it will revel in peace

Shutters Down

when did the sun rise

when did it go down
between sunrises
and sunsets
where was time
where was life
where was i
if i am here now
i must have been
then too, but
mountains of paper
miles of commutation
kept the shutters down
no light came in
the decay went on
in the geometry
of ambition
and progression
maybe i came through
but what use was it
if i didn’t know
when the sun shone
and
when it went down

Lost Cause

suspended in
time and space
i swing like a
pendulum
like a baseless jelly
like a disappearing
mist
i do not know
my own relevance
i do not understand
what gap i fill
what role i play
what need i fulfil
i perform
i move
between extensions
and projections
i commute into the past
and delve into the future
yet
like a lost cause
i cannot come to grips
with this awesome
mystery
this gigantic immensity
i lose myself
in the backwaters
of life
and drown in the
quicksand of time

time

i was looking
out of the window
and i saw time
walk past
was it a stroll
or a gallop
i am afraid
i don’t remember
i have been
absent minded of late
guess its all
this loneliness
what does it matter
anyway
if it was
a gallop or a stroll
all that is important 
is that it has gone
time the elusive evader
it has gone or almost so
imagine
it walked past so close
and went unnoticed
unrealized
now don’t make excuses
of its hushed  footsteps
you were aware
what if only vaguely
you could
have woken up
made a start
now don’t hasten
don’t scramble
it’s a lost race
you’ll only break
your neck